weakness

as my eyes struggle to open i swear hear my name
as they sharpen into focus so does my heartache 
i remember why i'm tired now, i was up so late last night
preparing for a violent throw down within my own mind
if i knew the last time we kissed 
would be the last time we did
i would've punched you in the face
before you turned to walk away
but i suppose i would've been too weak 
what with your eyes suppressing me 
forcing my surrender to anything i'd like to believe  

liquid courage

it's unapologetic

how the liquid courage 

     of last night 

          feels like poison in my bones this morning 

the whirl of hope 

and the brokenness of promises 

     are unleashed in the daylight 

                        and it hurts

any beautiful thoughts of you 

are shattered with the realization 

      of how damaging they were

           of how damaging you were 

you're nothing you say you are 

and you're irresponsibly mean

so goodbye then

i'll see you 

when your eyes are dead

        and only the moon shines

sweetest girl

she drank her pain away
till she was gone and shitfaced
there was something that she tried to prove
with a stranger in a bar bathroom
do you see what you've done to her?
cause she used to be the sweetest girl

she hears the laughs behind her back
she'll keep running, but she's trapped
smiles, though she's pissed
takes it out on her wrists
do you see what you've done to her?
cause she used to be the sweetest girl

laughing with her so called friends
trying hard to be like them
she's crying and she chokes
can't see her through the smoke
do you see what you've done to her?
cause she used to be the sweetest girl

at the party she avoids the trays
until someone hands her a full plate
the bits and pieces she consumes
end up wasted in the bathroom
do you see what you've done to her?
cause she used to be the sweetest girl

in our heads

i wanna have you over at my house
in the kitchen talking loud
sneaking glances over my way
wishing we were by ourselves

unexpected you walk in
with that sneaky devil grin
know exactly what i'm thinking
cannot wait till we begin

everyone's out in the garage
try to fight it and it's so hard
all the things that we could do
in your truck parked in the backyard

crouching down beside the car
bite my lip, inches apart
sneak a kiss under the pressure
well, let the fun now start

anxiousness in your eyes
determined one thing on your mind
i make my way back to the door
excuse yourself to go inside...

deluding

i'm trying to be honest

with a promise

never made

to guide me

but it hides me

in love's darkest cave

deluding

i'm confusing

when to let go

with when to hold on

i've got it wrong

but i'm just

justifying

timid lying

to myself

no history

just mystery

what to do

you're refreshing

but i'm stressing

don't make me move

my girls

her hearts been broken
she feels so inadequate
but she's too soft spoken
but why won't he commit?
thoughts keep her up at night
people telling her she's weak
one more year,  keep up the fight
shes the strongest girl you'll ever meet

she feels so strongly
never wants to let go
she's been done so wrongly
feeling hurt and hollow
she's grown up so much now
no longer shy and meek
turned her life around
she's the strongest girl you'll ever meet

she'd give him anything
except what he wants
proud she wears that ring
as temptation taunts
works hard to play hard
the world sits at her feet
she plays all the right cards
and she's the strongest girl you'll ever meet

different battles
different fears
living learning
beyond their years
guards build up
hearts recline
knowledge grows
in passing time
racking up
experience
take the world with
confidence
you're beautiful, live faithfully
you're the strongest girls I'll ever meet

someday

your eyes they blaze through me
looking down smiling lazily
messy hair, tousled tastefully

eyes alive crazed, they dance
weak, my knees don't stand a chance
enticed by your slow romance

walk around the pool table
rest your finger at my navel
have to breathe; I'm hardly able

locking eyes as you progress
feathered kissed on my neck
shriving, I am out of breath

hands gentle upon my face
leaves no time to contemplate
dizzy, the bar fades away

suddenly, I hear my name
look across as you say hey
smiling, I think disarrayed...


someday.